Sorry for not posting so many days cause got too much thing happen. happy or not happy. Friday went to cityhall with classmates to countdown YOG suppose to stay till 9 but we around 6 plus went off le. have fun took alot of pictures. it is coming out on my next post. Saturday went to bugis for the flag day. we are super slack. =)) at night went to movie with baby and christine we watch The Proposal. super nice and super funny. hahas! we went to mostafa after tat for shopping. there is ultimate smelly. ii dunno what smell but ii just dun like. sorry. nowadays really bother about lots of things. already got no time yet have to do housework. if ur at home why cant eu just helped? this is a house not school even in school students also help out keep the classroom clean right? ii really got no energy le. ii keep dragging myself to do things. what is family for? care and love eu? but why cant ii feel it? ii really wanna to love my family but why cant eu guys to let me feel tat eu love me? why ii always feel tat eu ppl cant see or feel me? infront of brother and sister mum seems like she cant see me.mum ii really loves eu. I REALLY LOVES MY FAMILY! BUT WHY CANT THEY LET ME FEEL TAT THEY LOVE ME TOO? II DONE SO MUCH THINGS FOR THEM WHY CANT THEY SEE OR FEEL IT? WHY AM II LIKE TRASH INFRONT OF THEM? whys? ii dunno. ii really dunno. when ii need help is there anyone who gives me a helping hand? when ii need someone to rely on is there someone for me? sometimes ii really feeling like dying or cutting myself up.die maybe selfish because ii left the one who love me the most behind suffering or maybe there wont be ppl suffering or crying over my death? but when ii die who is going to take care mom? Brother? Sis? ii dunno. ii dun wan her to be alone. cause she is my beloved mom. cutting myself up will only make him angry ii know.tats why i didnt do it. now the only thing tat held me back to live is only jingxun and mom. ii only hope they appreciate what ii have done for them and this family. ii might have change. change to rude? this is what brother said. he say ii had become rude. but there is also a reason for this. ii might have change but this is me. ii dun wan to become like last time. weak and let ppl bully. ii dun wan. ii wanna lead my own life.why must there be death and ppl leaving eu? ii really hate it. eu call this life. but ii really hate life! hate this kind of life! btw saying all this in blog doesnt mean wanna let reader to pity me or whatsoever. Blog is only the place whr ii can spill all my unhappiness. sometime ii really wish ii can not being so sensitives and so emotional.

♥ 11:47 pm